


My Apologies

by Ragingstillness



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Poetry, TW: very slight abuse mention, sad with a happy end, zades
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-03
Updated: 2016-10-03
Packaged: 2018-08-19 08:24:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8197829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ragingstillness/pseuds/Ragingstillness
Summary: Author's note: Just a cute Zades poem I wrote from Hades' perspective to Zelena. The format was partially inspired by a poem I wrote for my mother on Mother's Day. I tend to write poetry in free verse and I am only an aspiring poet so please let me know how I did. R&R, thank you.





	

I’m sorry I wasn’t there  
The day you were born  
When even the child you were  
The babe  
Understood how much pain it was in  
When your mother left you  
You went crazy then,   
Swooping yourself away from the pain  
To cry in your new mother’s arms  
And I wasn’t there

I’m sorry my arms didn’t cradle you  
Lying in a separate room  
As your second chance died of illness  
In the nearby bedroom  
You cried  
And he found it infuriating  
How insensitive of you to not know how he was suffering  
When you were suffering right along with him

I’m sorry I couldn’t help  
When your father first hit you with his words  
When you felt the first sting  
In your red beating heart  
Of pain you had never known  
When you began to question yourself  
Your innocence  
And who you were  
I would have told you exactly the kind of girl you were

I’m sorry I didn’t throw myself in front of you  
When he first hit you for real  
When the hand smacked across your cheek  
And the stick cracked across your unblemished back  
Making the first of scars that I long to one day trace with my lips  
And turn from pain to healing  
But I wasn’t there

I’m sorry you had to do all that you did  
The blisters on your palms  
Your cracked knuckles  
Bruised knees  
And shattered pride  
You broke your back for a stinking tavern  
And wandering hands of the much too old, too drunk  
Carrying that thing home for the day’s worth of scars  
But I would have lent you a hand

I’m sorry I was not the one with the answers  
When you lost what made you you  
To a careless word  
The sheer invalidation  
Of your work, your name, your birth  
And the bastard who thought to exploit it  
By sending you to a man who only treated you worse  
I would have taught you with the utmost care

I’m sorry I didn’t get the chance to slam that man  
When he had the nerve to guess your heart  
To judge you for his example  
When he knew your background  
For it mirrored his own much too well  
I’m glad you ran  
It was the bravest move   
And only you could have done it  
I wish I could have expressed my pride then and there

I’m sorry you were betrayed again  
When they who called themselves your family  
Turned on you with all the patience of two year olds  
Looking for any excuse to expel   
The strongest of their group  
I’m not talking about magic  
And you still didn’t hate   
You saved that girl’s life  
You wonderful wonderful woman  
I would have ruled at your side

I’m sorry I messed up  
When I finally was there  
I came on too fast  
We weren’t ready  
I wasn’t and you weren’t  
And it was unbelievably unfair to throw that on you  
So thank you for rejecting me  
I just hope that the brief care that coated your heart  
Stayed with you on the coldest nights

I’m sorry you lost control  
And I wasn’t there to hold the broken pieces together  
As you fell to murder  
And adultery  
And slavery  
Trying to grasp something you’d never have  
Even if you went back and did it all over again  
And you tried  
But as terrible as it was  
You got a little squirming fraction of your heart out of it  
Just enough border pieces   
To begin filling in the center of the puzzle  
And for that I am grateful

But I’m not sorry you’re here now  
I’m not sorry that I can talk to you  
I’m not sorry for your brilliant smiles  
I’m not sorry for the way your heart speeds up around me  
I’m not sorry for how I can’t keep my hands off of yours  
I’m not sorry for how I imagine you dancing in my arms  
I’m not sorry for red wine in glasses  
Or withered flowers  
Or my romantic taste in music  
I’m not sorry for grasping onto you  
And never letting go  
I’m not sorry for kissing you  
Not at all  
And most of all,  
I’m not sorry for those first little jumps  
Of my heart beneath your hand  
And the little breaths in your voice  
Or how great you look  
When you’re in love

**Author's Note:**

> Author's note: 
> 
> Just a cute Zades poem I wrote from Hades' perspective to Zelena. The format was partially inspired by a poem I wrote for my mother on Mother's Day. I tend to write poetry in free verse and I am only an aspiring poet so please let me know how I did. R&R, thank you.


End file.
